Sometimes All You Need to do is Listen

I woke up today in a crappy mood.  Anyone who knows me may be amazed to hear that.  While nothing cataclysmic happened I just woke up in a way unaccustomed to me. 

I tried to push myself back into the groove, to start the habits that fuel me.  They flooded my brain.  What should I do first?  Read? Meditate? Go for a jog? Nothing was clicking.  I didn’t want to lay in bed.  Even though the heat did not allow me a perfect night sleep I could never justify sleeping in.  That is one habit that is deeply engrained, thankfully.

I got up and made my bed and threw on my running gear.  I looked at my iPhone and realized I had forgotten to charge it the night before.  Damn! My retentive brain would not allow me to jog without being able to track the calories and miles.  Into the charger it went.  With time to fill I laid back on my bed and turned on some meditation music.

After the requisite deep breaths I then wondered how I should meditate.  Would I simply bring myself to this moment or would I go a little deeper and make contact with my guides? Even that choice wasn’t clear as my mind wrestled ever so briefly with the decision. 

As my pulse slowed and my body relaxed the answer was chosen for me.  I become aware of all the subtle sounds of the morning. Cars whizzed by the end of the street hurriedly.  Crickets in the yard seemed unusually active with their chirping.  Then most wonderfully a silence fell.  Crickets seemed to quiet.  Cars seemed absent.  The only thing I heard at that point was silence.

My body was light as it laid upon my bed.  No muscled clenched. I was awash in serenity.  Before I could even map out a plan my soul knew what it needed, a moment of silence.

My retentive brain chimed in briefly to say that I needed to make this a formal meditation session, focus on breathing, etc.  Thankfully the stillness that preceded that moment prevailed.  The words of a higher source stifled my eager brain. 

“You woke up in a crappy mood.  You experienced that.  You awoke restless, questioning everything human.  Now you are experiencing what it is like to be more than human.  Stay in this moment and revel in the peace.”

The message rang true.  It didn’t simply make sense, it resonated in every cell of my being.  For roughly ten minutes I laid there, blissfully content, my only goal to listen to the sounds around me, the sounds and the silence.

Then, peacefully,  I grabbed my phone and headed down the driveway jogging.  As I turned onto the street I was bathed in sunlight; I could feel the warmt.  I lifted my face to the sky, greeting the sun even further.  With grateful tears gently welling up in my eyes I humbly said “Thank you”.